Page 58 - The Grotesque Children's Book

“Love of family is the most precious commodity on earth! Nothing is as
precious to me as my children.”

--unconvincing.

“I wouldn't have given them up for anything, not even if you were to have
offered to pile up all the gold of an infinite desert of gold stretched as far as the
eye could see. But I have learned this now too late, too late! Oh, what have I
done! What have I done!” And a tear rolled out of the corner of the Emperor's
eye, down his cheek and, when it reached the corner of his mouth, followed the
very track which his trickle of saliva had followed down his chin. In statues of
the Emperor Aurumius IV carved after his death, sculptors are fond of
depicting both tracts, from the eye and from the mouth. Look for them.

Now, Diavolo's heart wasn't made of stone. It was made of gold, which is
a metal, not a stone. And he actually felt a little sorry for the Emperor.
However, he was a demon, so don't imagine he would let Aurumius out of his
bargain just like that.

“I'll tell you what,” said Diavolo d'Oro, “I'll give each of your children one
chance -- one! -- to guess how it is that I turn things to gold. If any of them
guesses correctly, I will release them all, and you, of the terms of this bargain
you made with a devil. If, however, after each of your children has had a
guess, if none has guessed correctly, then they shall forever be the caryatid
pillars on my golden octagonal palace.”

And so it was that each of the Emperor's children was given a chance
save their brothers and sisters and father. Diavolo had Aurumius line up his
children all in a row so that Diavolo needed to explain only once how the
bargain was to work. “I will lead each of you, one at a time, into my Palace,”
said Diavolo to the children, “where you can inspect anything and everything
as long and as hard as you wish, up until the moment the sun sets. Even the
very Transmutation Room itself, I'll show you that as well. However, upon the

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